Chanel Is Not Just A Diva...She's A Dustmop.

[Chanel]

Once upon a time when I was very, very small (actually1.6LBS!) I lived on a farm in Nicholasville with my Mom, Dad and 4 brothers and sisters. We were not the only ones either...I guess all together there were at least 75 of us puppy dogs all playing out in the yard

under the trees. I had so much fun digging in the dirt, chasing and eating yummy flies and running around laughing at all my cousins and friends all day. On some days I was sad because Jan(our caretaker) would let a human in our yard and before you know it they would spend a little time picking us up, turning us upside down then suddenly one of us would disappear! I would look everywhere...behind the trees, under the house, but they were GONE! It was scary!

One day in October when I was 9 weeks old I was lying in the dirt out in the yard minding my own business when another one of those humans was let in. This one was different; she even had a car with a funny picture on the door. What the heck is a Realtor???? She picked up my mean sister, the one that likes to pull my tail and held her for a moment then she put her down. Next thing I knew I was scooped up into her arms and she was looking deep into my eyes. Wow! It was like a lighting bolt hit me! I couldn't stop my tail from spinning around and I just had to taste her hand cause she smelled so good! This was wild...I knew that the others had disappeared after humans had picked them up but I wanted her to take me!! I must be crazy! Jan told her I was happy all the time and that I looked just like my Dad. She looked at me a little closer, then gave me a kiss and next thing you know, Jan was giving me a bath in the sink, trimming my nails and a blow dry hairdo! I thought my heart would pop right out of me it was beating so hard! Jan was giving her some instructions and the next thing you know....just like magic...I was GONE too!

Suddenly, I was in her car and we were leaving the farm. I was afraid to move a muscle and curled up tight in her lap as she zipped down the road in that BIG monster car. I tried to be very quiet, but I couldn't stop shaking from all the excitement. She kept her hand on me to calm me down as she talked to me. She told me that she was my new Mommie and that I would be a princess and live in fairyland with all the toys and food I would ever want. Hey, this sounds like Heaven! Could it be that I died while I was having that 1^st bath? Hmmmm..I scratched my ear to see if I could feel it. Yep...this is ReaL! I love my new Mommie! I snuggled deeper into her lap and fell fast asleep. ZZzzzzzz

Ohhh Nooo...now what??? The car has stopped and Mommie is carrying me to another house and here's another human. Mommie says it's my Aunt Nancy. We go in and she hands me to her for inspection. Ohhhh this is nice. She has nice big cushions right on her chest that I snuggle into! I think she likes me too! I think I passed inspection and Aunt Nancy hands me back to Mommie. Off we go again in the car to WHOKNOWSWHERE.

After arriving in WHOKNOWSWHERE, I realize that it is my palace that she promised! This is where I will be a princess! Whoopeeee!!!!! I can't believe my luck! Even though I truly enjoyed digging in dirt I know I will never be doing that stuff again. Mommie would send me to the bath for sure! She has a nice box for me to hide in and a stuffed teddy bear that is almost as big as me. I love him and bite him just to show him who's boss!

Take THAT!

Ahhhh...life is good. I soon learn that I am in charge here. I am fed when I want, new toys appear everyday, but why does Mommie insist that I go outside after I eat??? Cheepers, it's cold out there! It makes me want to pee! For some reason she won't let me poop inside my palace either. Mommie can be a pill sometimes! I love my new food but I am having some sort of tummy trouble and things are not feeling right. Quch! It hurts! I gave Mommie quite a scare during the night and she takes me straight to a hospital! Now that is a scary place...don't let anyone take you there! After more of these episodes she finally gets me in to see Dr. Taylor and together they figure out that it was the bad Diamond puppy food I had eaten at Jan's farm. I hope I get better because Mommie really is worried for me. I do love her! Heaven can't be better than my palace...right? I hope she still wants to keep me. I'm worried too!

Let me tell you about doggie day care....that lasted one day!!! Mommie thought she had found this fantastic posh place for me to stay during the afternoons while she was out making us some $$$. All the inmates were fun but I have to admit although they were a smelly bunch. After I got home, Aunt Davina was rubbing my tummy and said,"What's that spot that's moving?" I thought all hell had broken loose as they searched all over me for my first flea! It ended with a bath and some sort of ointment from the store. Those fleas can be a pain in the butt! Needless to say Mommie won't allow me to go back and grooms me herself every day. I love being combed but the nail trimming is for the birds!

My Mamaw loves me and comes in to check on me a lot. She looks a lot like Mommie and I like to run from her so she will squawk! I mind her most of the time. I used to bite her too hard and every now and then she would have to get her fingers repaired. Blood tastes funny! :~9

Nighttime is not scary at all when I sleep with my bunny. He always keeps me safe and so far nothing has ever happened to me. He even went with me to see Dr. Taylor and kept me company all night while I listened to crying from other doggies and kitties at the animal hospital. I bet they wished they had someone like him too! He's a true blue friend that I can trust. Mommie has friends like that too. They are my Aunties!

Well I could go on and on but a lot has happened in my first year.

I have learned that...

1. Butterflies never let you get too close
2. You will get in lots of trouble when you eat poop in the yard
3. If you bark loud enough you get another treat (this works best when Mommie is on the phone)
4. Pillows are good for hiding your treats under
5. Flies are fun to catch...but taste like chicken!
6. Stay in your own yard
7. Be quiet when you get up in the morning
8. Share your toys and don't bite too hard when playing
9. Accept other playmates only after you have smelled their butts.
10. Be sweet and you will get EVERYTHING!!

The End